When we bought the ranch house, something very interesting came to our attention. Apparently, the county has an easement on our property for the highway that runs in front of the house. Basically, we own half the highway.
That got me thinking…Since its our property, we could:
Make it a toll road. Anyone coming from a locality that has a Starbucks must bring me a Venti Vanilla Latte with whole milk and NO foam.
Regular commuters can skip ahead of the line, if they make trips to CostCo and Trader Joe’s for me on a bi-weekly basis (it’s already growing tiresome to drive an hour to get groceries).
Have an obligatory Farm-Tourism Experience to pass. (Those are all the rage right now!) To pass, you have to clean out the chicken coop, shovel horse manure, turn the compost pile, rota-till the garden or any other chores I find tedious.
Have a drag-queen fashion show, complete with a bedazzled runway, thumping house music and lots of glitter! (the locals would LOVE that!)
Invite some professional Canadian curlers and host a week-long curling championship.
Require that drivers blow bubbles for the kids for at least 5 full minutes. I’m getting really out of breath.
Mandate that people open all their car windows and take a couple hundred mosquitos and other bugs with them. I’m tired of looking like I have chicken pox from all the bites.
Set up a Zombie Apocolypse checkpoint- just to make sure that zombies aren’t coming into Sierraville to eat the faces off the ranchers and livestock.
The possibilites are endless! Suggestions welcome!